The Niko Horror Picture Show
by Stargategeek
Summary: When Helen gets a note requesting a meeting with her and her team down at a Midnight Revival Theatre, things blow up into the realm of the ridiculous, especially when she decides to drag a certain ex-vamp along for the ride. Not a song fic! COMPLETE :
1. To The Late Night Double Feature Show We

Chapter 1 – To The Late Night Double Feature Picture Show We Go

_I knew Leo G. Carrol _

_Was over a barrel _

_When tarantula took to the hills _

_And I really got hot _

_When I saw Janette Scott _

_Fight a triffid that spits poison and kills _

_Dana Andrews said prunes _

_Gave him the runes _

_And passing them used lots of skills _

_But when worlds collide said George Pal to his bride,__"I'm gonna give you some terrible thrills!"_

_Science fiction double feature _

_Docter X will build a creature. _

_See androids fighting Brad and Janet _

_Anne Francis stars in Forbidden Planet _

_At the late night, double feature, picture show._

Helen sighed at the note.

It had arrived early that morning, no one knew how. All that they found was a note attached to a dagger stabbed into her desk.

At first she thought it was Nikola up to one of his pranks again, but he had been in the library the whole night. She also wondered if it might have been John, of course, John never resorted to theatrics, it reminded him too much of his Ripper days.

The note was written in blood, belonging to an unidentified being, possibly non-human, the tests were non-conclusive.

It stated:

_Dear Magnus,_

_Must see you and your team. Come and find me Friday, 12 pm, at the revival theatre. Come dressed for the occasion._

_From,_

_Mister X_

Helen found it ridiculous at first, which brought her to Nikola who had stared dumbfoundedly at the note and made a cheeky remark.

And now she was doing this, going, in costume, to the New City Revival Theatre.

Either this mysterious creature didn't want to stand out, or he had an evil sense of humor, either way she had made up her mind.

The team walked into her office.

"What's up Doc?" asked Henry.

"We're going on a very interesting mission, to the Revival Theatre in New City, we've been requested over there, possibly for a meeting, whoever wrote this note wanted us, as a team to go there in costume," Helen gestured to the bags lying on the couch. "I had some contacts bring those up for us."

The team stared dumbly at her, slightly in shock.

"Do you know what is playing at that theatre?" asked Will.

"Yes, the Rocky Horror Picture Show, I have costumes for each of you," she stood up and handed one of the bags to Will and another to Kate.

"These were fitted in your size."

Kate smiled widely.

She loved going to that Midnight Theatre Show. It was a riot!

She opened the bag and smiled at the costume inside.

"Nice!" she exclaimed.

"Will you'll be dressing as Brad, it shouldn't be too awkward for you, Henry, I hope you are comfortable enough to wear this," she handed him a bag and he peered inside.

"No, not Dr. Frankenfurter! Why can't I be Eddie?" he whined staring at the heap of black material and lace.

"I tried but there were none," Helen shrugged and Will laughed.

"This is so not fair!" Henry whined again.

"I promise we will not take any photos," smiled Helen.

Helen handed another bag to Big Guy and he peered inside.

"Aww why does he get to be Riff-Raff?" sniveled Henry.

"It's the only costume that came in his size," shrugged Helen.

"I'll help you with some make-up Big Guy, you'll rock that party!" jumped Kate and she pulled the two of them out leaving only Will behind.

"What's the last bag for?" he asked.

Helen stared at it.

"Let's call it a well deserved comeback," Helen smiled, telling Will she wasn't going to reveal any more.

He sighed and left to put on the costume.

An hour and a half later and the team came back into Helen's office dressed al Rocky.

Helen laughed lightly.

Will didn't look much different, just pantless, Kate fit the Columbia costume perfectly and wore it with a flourish, Big Guy frowned in the bald cap and complete face paint, and Helen herself, dressed as Janet, wore simple white heels with a slip and a white bra, and she still looked stunning.

Henry peaked his head.

"I look ridiculous!" he pouted.

Helen nearly broke into giggles seeing him in the wig and make-up, but when he stepped out, fish-stockings, heels, and all, she nearly died with laughter.

"This meeting better be good, because I don't think I can fight in these heels," complained Henry.

"But they show off your legs so well, Heinrich," joked Will.

"More like Henrietta," teased Kate.

Big Guy grunted out a laugh.

"That's not funny! Let's just go and get this humiliation over with!" said Henry, keeping his arms well wrapped around his body.

"Well we can't yet, we still have one more coming," said Helen with a sly smile.

"Who?" asked Will, looking at her with curiosity.

Right then the door opened.

"Helen, I don't really understand the point of this, these make hardly adequate swim trunks and they're awfully tight, makes me wonder the true purpose for asking me to try these on…"

Nikola froze seeing all the eyes planted him in shock.

There he stood, the one and only Nikola Tesla, clad in nothing but a tight pair of gold briefs, dressed as Rocky.

Kate nearly swallowed her tongue.

"Oh you vixen," muttered Nikola at Helen, his tone loathing at having fallen for her trick.

Helens eyes laughed and sparkled in return.

"Not quite complete yet," smirked Helen and she pulled out a platinum blonde wig and walked over to him and placed it snugly over his dark spikes.

"Is this some kind of kinky costume party?" asked Nikola, a little confused, "Not that I mind your outfit, mind you, you should wear it more often.

"This, Nikola, is our mission attire," Helen tapped his cheek lightly, his face falling into an even more confused expression.

"Please explain," he looked at her with his blue-grey eyes.

"We're going to a show, and this is what we wear, I'll explain more to you on the way there," she took his hand and dragged him out of the office, with the team following behind.

Will smiled widely.

When Helen got payback, she got it, there was no way he was not going to be taking a few candid photographs on this one.

He looked at Kate and she looked back.

"Take as many pictures as you can?" she asked, practically reading his mind.

"Oh yeah," Will said and pulled out his iPhone and snapped a quick one. "To the late night double feature show we go."


	2. Dammit Janet

Chapter 2 – Dammit Janet

The team rode into New City in the big van.

Big Guy was at the wheel, Will in the front passengers seat, Kate and Henry in the back, and Nikola and Helen in the middle.

Helen was trying to explain to Nikola the mission, and the reason behind the costumes they were wearing.

"So it's like a hippie get together in drag?" he asked, his eyebrows quirked in confusion.

"Something like that, these Midnight Revival Theatre's keep it popular, though the premace of the whole thing is kind of non-existant," she shrugged.

"And I am dressed as?" he gestures to the gold shorts.

"Rocky Horror, Dr. Frank-N-Furters creature," she stated quickly.

"Ah, am I the big romantic lead?" he smirked cheekily.

"You're kind of pointless as far as the story is considered," she teased back.

"Aww, and I'm the title character!" he teased back.

"The story is more about Dr. Frank-N-Furter, Henry is wearing his costume," Helen gestured back to Henry who tried to cover himself up more ashamedly.

"Ahh, nice, but I'd much prefer it on you," he grinned and Helen rolled her eyes.

"Doesn't come in my size, it's meant for a dude to wear," she glared at him before sighing and leaning back in the seat.

"Well, no problem, I still love your outfit, it shows enough," he gestured to the plain white bra and slip.

"Don't get any ideas, Nikola, this is all you're going to see," she slapped his hand that was slowly creeping closer to her bare arm.

"Fine, but I still don't know why I'm here on this ridiculous trip, in this ridiculous outfit!" he sighed crossing his arms over his very bare chest.

"The letter requested the team to be there, the whole team, and unfortunately that includes you now, so you get the gold shorts and wig and you'll deal with it, besides, there will be tons others there, we'll all blend in very quickly," Helen patted his shoulder gently.

"You mean there is going to be a ton of proud young boys with blond hair and golden trunks strutting around there?" he looked at her.

"Actually, most dress as Riff-Raff or Eddie or Frank, not many people have the guts to dawn the Rocky outfit, you might be the only one," joked Kate, watching Nikola's eyes widen in terror.

"Dammit," he muttered.

"Janet!" sung Will, Kate, and Henry simultaneously.

Helen chuckled as Nikola missed the reference and just stared at them in utter confusion.

Nikola started fiddling with the blonde wig madly, and Helen had to hold her giggles as he spat some of the fake locks out of his mouth only to have it replaced with more hair.

He finally pulled the wig off and glared it.

"This is mad!" he growled at the blonde tangle of hair in his hands.

"Oh Brad," came the chorus from the rest of the group.

"Who the heck is Brad?" he barked, and they laughed even more.

Helen smiled and took the wig and fixed on top of his head.

"Oh Nikola, you have much to learn," she smirked teasingly and patted his pouting cheek.

He glared.

"Dammit."

"Janet."

Helen finally broke and laughed as Nikola pouted even more. In the wig and the shorts he looked positively adorable while pouting.

"You all suck," he muttered and crossed his arms as they kept driving.


	3. Over At The Frankenstein Place

Chapter 3 – Over At The Frankenstein Place

Helen stepped out of the van into the crowd of similarly dressed people.

"Not as many people as I thought there'd be," said Will stepping out in his white briefs and fake glasses.

"It's not a rock concert, but it's still a riot, most of the people that come to this things are wild fans! They go crazy and know all the lyrics, it's so much fun!" smiled Kate.

"I can't imagine why," Nikola climbed out of the van and tugged at his gold shorts to make them more comfortable.

"It's a fad, hard to explain," Kate shrugged.

"Ah," Nikola gave her a funny look.

"Well you have to admit the songs are catchy, _'There's a light!'_" started Henry.

"_Over at the Frankenstein place!" _joined in the rest of them, except for Helen and Nikola.

Helen chuckled as they walked into the theatre.

As soon as they walked in she got bumped by a man dressed at The Criminologist with his face shielded from them, and found a piece of paper placed into her hand.

She looked around for the man but he had disappeared into the crowd.

Will noticed a bunch of young girls dressed as Columbia and Magenta staring at Nikola dressed as Rocky.

Nikola barely batted an eyelash. If he had noticed them he was too busy staring at Helen's back, obviously making mental pictures of her skin, because he probably would never see so much ever again after this mission was over.

Will laughed lightly. Chalk it up to Nikola to completely lose all focus when Helen was around.

Helen turned around and nearly bumped into Nikola, his eyes widen when their view shifted from her flawless back to the white bra and the cleavage peaking out from it.

"Focus Nikola!" she smacked the side of his head and made him stand back aways from her. "Look at this!"

She lifted up the scrap of paper.

"It looks like we have designated seating."

Will took the paper and read it.

_ROW D._

Was all it said.

"I guess that's where he will meet us," sighed Will handing the piece of paper back to Magnus.

"I guess," she nodded and stuffed the slip of paper in her bra

Nikola watched the entire scene intently.

Helen stared at him.

"Nikola!" she snapped her fingers in front of his face. "Be professional for once!"

"Sorry, your outfit is just terribly distracting," he smirked.

"Well think of this then, we are in a public place, on a mission, I run an entire network, and you are wearing very tight pants," she glared teasingly, his smirk faltered and he looked down.

Helen smirked triumphantly and started walking to the auditorium looking for Row D, surprisingly, no one was seated on that particular row.

Helen shrugged and went to sit down, Will, Henry, Kate, Big Guy and Nikola followed sitting along the row.

"Hey this theatre's nice compared to some of the dingy places I've been to, at least the seats are clean," mumbled Kate as she sat down.

"There are theatre's more dingier than this?" asked Nikola incredulously.

Helen sighed at Nikola, this man barely bathes when he's in the middle of a project and he criticizes the hygiene of this place.

Nikola sat beside her with Will, Kate, and Henry to her left.

"Do you have any money for popcorn?" asked Nikola childlishly, holding out his hand expectantly.

"Nikola, we're on a mission," she looked at him sternly.

"So…do you have money for popcorn?" he looks at her with big blue eyes.

"Does it look like I have money on me?" she gestured to the outfit.

"I don't know but I'd sure like to search and find out," he grinned cheekily.

"No! Just sit back and watch out for any suspicious characters.

He pouted and sat back in his seat as the lights went down and the movie went up.


	4. Let's Do The Time Warp Again

Chapter 4 – Let's Do The Time Warp Again

Nikola sat happily snacking on popcorn after Kate had gotten tired of his sniveling and bought him a bag.

Helen rolled her eyes at how childish he could be, especially over something so insignificant as popcorn.

He smiled in such a childlike glee to have it though, it was almost adorable, especially with the blonde wig a top his head.

She reached over to grab a piece and laughed when he smacked her hand making her drop it on to his lap.

Helen almost reached for it but hesitated, then shook her head deciding to forget about it.

Reaching for that one piece of popcorn on his lap wouldn't have been worth the trouble Nikola would stir up feeling her hand on his lap, knowing him he'd make some obscene comment that would leave her blushing, and he'd probably mention adjourning to the coat closet to have_ that _kind of fun, making her blush even more.

She put her hand on her lap and stared back at the screen, still seeing no sign of their mystery caller.

Though Kate was right, these event were quite the riot, people had joined in singing and dancing and throwing popcorn at the stage, and laughing and quoting, it was ridiculous, and Helen wondered why such a seemingly introverted abnormal would want to meet in a such a place as this.

The song Over At The Frankenstein Place ended and the crowds quieted down as the dialogue continued.

"Is mystery man a no show?" asked Will leaning over to her.

"I don't know, I don't want to take any chances," Helen whispered back.

People cheered as the character of Riff Raff opened the door to the castle and uttered "Hello."

Helen looked over at Nikola, who was eating very loudly.

"Do you mind Nikola? I don't need your excessively loud chewing in my ear, thank you," he sneered at her and went back to eating.

He is such a brat…

Suddenly the whole crowd disappeared like they were never there as the Time Warp cranked into gear.

_It's astounding_

_time is fleeting…_

Nikola looked around him.

"Is that supposed to happen?" he looked at Helen in surprise.

"I don't think so…" Helen muttered feeling that uneasy gut feeling down in the pit of her stomach.

_But listen closely, not for very much longer…_

Suddenly all of them got stuck their seats by an automated strap coming out and latching them underneath its grip.

_I remember doing the time warp…_

Helen felt the floor disappear under her and her chair disengage and start moving.

She squirmed to get free but she couldn't budge.

"Damn!" cried Nikola.

"I know!" she answered back looking for some way to stop it.

"I dropped my popcorn," whined Nikola.

Helen rolled her eyes as she watched her team, also stuck to their automated chairs move in the opposite direction, Kate and Henry's chairs moved one way, Will's chair took him the other, and Helen's chair moved her out of the room and down a trap door with Nikola trailing behind.

_Let's do the Time Warp again!_

Helen let out a frantic squeal as she traveled on this whirling roller coaster, with Nikola wailing behind her.

She suddenly found herself released from the seat and flying through the air, landing hard on the floor.

She groaned in slight pain, rolling over to release the pressure off her ribs.

She suddenly saw a flash of gold and Nikola came flying on top of her nearly knocking the wind out of her.

Helen gasped for breath and stared up at him.

He was shaking some orientation into his head and she was pinned under his body, time those tight shorts.

She felt his skin all along her body and almost shivered at the sensation when he shifted his weight.

"I'm sorry my darling, I couldn't control my landing, not that I am completely objected to it, I have wanted to be in this position with you for a long time," his hands fluttered to her waist and down her thighs.

Her logical brain kicked in and immediately pushed him off her.

"Seriously Nikola, do you ever stop?" she sighed exasperated.

"Not if I can help it," he smirked standing up.

Helen now regretted making him wear that.


	5. Sweet TransvestWhat?

Chapter 5 – Sweet Transvest-what?

Henry and Kate got up sorely from the floor and wiped the dust off their clothes.

"What the heck was that?" growled Kate.

"I don't know, but I just realized something, where did Big Guy disappear to, I didn't notice it till now, but we haven't seen him since we entered the building," pondered Henry.

"This is some kind of fun house we've stumbled onto," said Kate.

"Good thing I came prepared!" Henry pulled out his duffle bag and tossed Kate a stun weapon while he took off the ridiculous heels.

"Nice work Henry!" Kate smirked and stuffed the gun into her waistband.

Henry removed the stockings and corset and pulled out a pair of boxers and pants.

"I always pack extras," he smirked and took his clothes to one corner of the small room to change.

Kate examined the opposite wall as he did so.

It seemed to be some kind of underground chamber, no doors or tunnel systems in sight but that didn't mean there wasn't one, Kate thought it all felt a little too 'Saw' for her liking.

There were a few light fixtures on the walls and Kate figured she'd try there looking for a switch.

Henry finished changing and stuffed the offensive Rocky Horror garment in the duffle bag, hoping to never ever have to see them again.

"Ok, so how do we get out of this?" asked Henry to no one really; he just wanted to get it out there.

"There has to be some way out, we just have to look for it!" said Kate.

"Or hope the Doc finds it," mumbled Henry.

"Yah, where ever she is."

Will groaned catching his breath.

He picked himself up off the floor and looked around.

"What the hell?" he muttered to himself.

He saw a single, narrow doorway out of the room and went through it.

It led him to another room with 4 tv monitors, like a control centre, or something.

On the monitors he saw Henry and Kate in one room, searching for an exit, it seemed. Helen and Nikola were locked in another room, doing arguably the same thing, (literally arguably).

Big Guy was on the third monitor, they must've nabbed him before they had entered the auditorium, he was pacing furiously.

The fourth monitor was of the main auditorium facing the large screen where the movie was still playing.

A flash of yellow caught Will's eye and he saw a post-it note next to a button, saying press it.

He hesitated for a moment but did so.

Suddenly the room buzzed to life with noise.

_How do you do I_

_see you've met my_

_faithful handyman…_

Will watched the monitors, noticing all of the team look up at the same time, obviously he wasn't the only one who was suddenly being serenaded at.

_He's just a little brought down because_

_When you knocked_

_He thought you were the candyman…_

Will realized this was the soundtrack from the movie, it just felt ironic how it all fell into place.

_Don't get strung out by the way I look_

_Don't judge a book by it's cover_

_I'm not much of a man by the light of day_

_But by night I'm one hell of a lover…_

Will searched around for more controls to see if he could hack into the intercom system and contact the team, but he wasn't Henry, he barely knew how to hack a Facebook account let alone an intercom system in the house of weird.

_I'm just a sweet transvestite_

_From Transexual, Transylvania_

Helen looked at Nikola.

"This songs seems oddly well-placed, must be for a reason," her logical mind spurted with ideas.

"Maybe he just likes the music and is using it to mess with our heads, cause he's weird a socially deprived," he put his hands on his slender hips and frowned frustrated at the seemingly solid concrete walls.

"You would know all about that, pigeon boy," she retorted teasingly and he visibly tensed.

"I was using them for scientific research, they were not pets!" he growled.

"Say what you want, Nikola, but you had an affinity for those birds," she poked his shoulder blade and he twitched.

_Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound_

_You look like you're both pretty groovy…_

"Ok that felt strangely ironic," muttered Nikola.

Helen rolled her eyes and continued looking for any triggers to open a hidden door, or anything.

_Or if you want something visual_

_That's not too abysmal_

_We could take in an old Steeve Reeves movie…_

"I used to like this song," mumbled Kate as she sighed defeated.

"It's not that bad!" shrugged Henry.

"It's taunting us! Face it Henry there's no way out and it knows that and it's laughing at us!" she gestured wildly out of frustration.

"It as in Tim Curry?" Henry said sarcastically.

"You know what I mean!" she bit back and crossed her arms.

_Well you got caught with a flat_

_Well how 'bout that_

_Well babies don't you panic…_

Big Guy grunted angrily and slammed his fists on the concrete walls.

_By the light of the night_

_It'll all seem alright_

_I'll get you a Satanic mechanic_

Will looked up and saw the fourth monitor switch and across it read: _PRESS BUTTON NO. 4_

Will looked at the button next to the one he had just pressed and he looked at it carefully unsure of what it would do.

Eventually he shrugged and pressed it and another door opened up he ran through it still hearing the song blast from the hidden speakers.

He wound up in another room with another four monitors displaying the same video feeds, except for Big Guy, which had gone completely dark.

_Why don't you stay for the night…_

Will gulped slightly unsure what to do but kept watching the monitors in case.

_Or maybe a bite…_

Henry felt a twinge in hi stomach, damn he should've had some popcorn when he had the chance.

_I could show you my favorite obsession.._

Helen felt annoyance creep into her as the song kept playing and it was starting to get on her nerves.

Nikola was no help either as he kept getting distracted by her slip.

_I've been making a man_

_With blonde hair and a tan_

Nikola perked up with his childlike glee again.

"Hey that's me!" he looked at the discarded wig on the floor.

_And he's good for relieving my tension…_

Helen chuckled as he visibly deflated.

"Umm, nevermind," he coughed awkwardly and went back to sulking.

_So come up to the lab_

_And see what's on the slab_

_I see you shiver with antici…_

The whole team almost simultaneously held their breath, for reasons unknown.

_...pation…_

Helen exhaled, feeling ridiculous, when suddenly something emerged from the wall nearly stabbing her and she dashed to the other side of the room into Nikola's arms.

He smirked.

"It's nice to know you feel protected around me," he cupped her butt and she slammed the heel of her shoe into his foot and he yelped, releasing her.

_But maybe the rain_

_Isn't really to blame_

Henry and Kate moved back as what looked like gun chambers came out from the wall pointed straight at them.

"Ok, now we can worry!" said Henry.

_So I'll remove the cause_

Will watched in slight shock at the new developments and the fourth monitor flashed again.

IF YOU WANT TO SAVE YOUR FRIENDS

YOU HAVE TO PLAY MY GAME

BY TYPING IN THIS SINGERS NAME.

Will knew that was an easy question, too easy, but he took the keyboard and typed in the actor's name.

He heard an automated "Correct!"

And the Big Guy's monitor burst back to life, revealing him perfectly untouched, just pissed.

Will heard "Well Done, William and he froze not knowing where the voice had come from.

…this was going to be a long night…

_But not the symptom!_


	6. Hot Patootie

Chapter 6 – Hot Patootie

Will sighed with frustration as this little trivia game went on; the questions were relatively easy, but they just kept coming.

He looked up at the monitors.

Henry and Kate were standing, staring down the barrels of the guns sticking out of the wall, it was like a modern Indiana Jones scene, except, well, Henry was shorter.

Big Guy kept still but was glaring at the spikes threatening to lunge forward and snare him forever.

And Helen and Nikola had spent more time arguing with each other than actually paying attention to the vicious weapons pointed at them. From what Will could tell, Nikola was being an ass, as always.

Will sighed again as another trivia question came up.

He typed out the answer and the little "Correct!" resounded in his head.

Will rubbed his eyes, feeling tired and helpless.

But, instead of yet another question the 4th monitor flashed and said:

PRESS BUTTON

Will thanked whatever masterful deity was watching down on him and pressed the button and a hidden door opened up, and behind it was Big Guy.

The dangerous weapons gone back into their resting place, and a look of relief over the hairy man's face.

"Guh! Took you long enough!" he grumbled.

"You're welcome by the way," mumbled Will.

As Will stepped through the entrance behind him closed, trapping him and Big Guy back in the small chamber.

"Aw crap," muttered Will.

The music started up again through all the chambers.

"This is starting to get old!" yelled Will to whoever was the puppet master of this fun house.

_Whatever happened to Saturday night?..._

"Oh Meatloaf," sighed Helen.

"Seriously, Helen, now is not the time to be thinking of your stomach, if you were really that starving you could've brought money for popcorn," Nikola raised his hands in that annoying manner he did when ever he pointed out something he thought was obvious, like his genius. Of course he was talking out of his ass.

"No, that's not…nevermind," she shrugged him off and went back to examining the weapons pointed at her and Nikola; if they were at all weapons.

Nikola stepped close to one and it's mechanism started to turn.

"Don't get to close, Nikola! They don't look friendly!" she warned.

"Really? I thought they wanted to have tea with us!" he bit back sarcastically.

"Please, you've never drunk tea in your life, you've always been in the habit of depleting wine cellars," she carefully eyed the devices.

"And I always will! I will never succumb to your bland british sense of taste! You can keep your shepherd's pie and chips! To hell!" he said dramatically, almost making her laugh.

"You enjoyed shepherd's pie when living at oxford, I remember!" she accused him with a pointed finger.

"I tolerated it, there's a difference!" he gave her a pointed finger back.

"How did we get on to this?" she rolled her eyes, she's never argued about so many pointless things in her life.

"You were talking about meatloaf, another british delicacy I will never again shove down my throat so long as I live," he reached out to touch another device and it almost takes his hand off.

"Not meatloaf the food, Meatloaf the man, he's an actor/artist, he sings this song that our captor has chosen to torment us with."

"Oh, well that makes more sense," he dismisses the fact and goes back to examining the devices.

_Hot patootie, bless my soul_

_I really love that Rock and Roll…_

"I really hope there is a reason for all this," mumbled Kate.

"Why?" asked Henry.

"Cause it's either that or we are being tortured by a maniac and his obsession for cult classics for the heck of it! It's pissing me off! STOP IT!" growled Kate, raising her fist to some invisible force.

"Well, it could be worse, could've tortured us with the soundtrack of Hairspray…or Sweeney Todd," shrugged Henry.

"True…but still, this is fricking ridiculous! I am going to die to Hot Patootie!" Kate tossed something at the offending weapons and it was immediately disintegrated in front of her.

"Um…don't do that again," said Henry, his back pressed firmly against the wall.

"Gotcha…" said Kate moving next to him her hand bumping against his and grabbing it tightly.

Henry looked down at her hand in his, almost in a state of shock.

Kate followed his gaze and immediately let go and crossed her arms defensively.

"Sorry…I thought it was…my gun…my bad…" she shifted her gaze downwards and shuffled away from him.

_Hot patootie, bless my soul_

_I really love that Rock and Roll…_

"This is ridiculous!" cried Will.

"Guh! Guh!" Big Guy grunted in agreement.

"How do you expect us to win if you keep changing the rules!" Will shouted loudly at the 'puppet master' of this maze, feeling frustrated and pissed. "What is the reason? TELL ME THAT!"

A secret compartment opens revealing a screen with more instructions on it.

"Not again!" grumbled Will.

TO MOVE ALONG

SING A-LONG

"You have got to be kidding me," Will rolled his eyes and then looked at Big Guy. "You are doing it with me!"

Big Guy glared.

"Don't give me that look, I know you know the lyrics, you and Henry spent all of Halloween singing it! Who is watching?"

He grumbled but shrugged and relented.

"Guh! You owe me one!"

_My head used to swim from the perfume I smelled _

_My hands kinda fumbled with her white plastic belt…_

"Hmm…I kind of like where this song is going," smirked Nikola, he looked over to Helen suggestively.

"You're incorrigible!" she glared at him.

"You were thinking the same thing, don't deny it!" he grinned even wider and pointed a lean finger at her.

She rolled her eyes.

"You know, I bet that's why you dragged me along on this mission, in this outfit, you kinky little snake," he stepped forward, his eyes lingering on her chest.

Helen lifted a hand to push him and his gaze away, and was about to open her mouth to shoot him down once more, but he was quick, and grabbed her hand before she uttered a syllable and pinned her against the wall, his bare chest flush against hers.

Helen nearly lost her breath.

"Nikola! What are you doing?" she spurted out, trying not to get distracted by his proximity.

"Ohh, come on Helen, you've wanted me to do this ever since I kissed you, back in Rome!" he held her arms strongly.

"You are being ridiculous, this is not the time for you to get lost in your sexual depravity, we are probably being watched!" she squirmed a bit, but that just ended with her grinding against him, which wasn't a good thing at this moment.

He chuckled and lightly brushed his lips against hers, Helen found it hard to decide whether it should be counted as a stolen kiss this time.

Her heart skipped a beat, and she was pretty sure Nikola noticed, as his smirk just got wider.

"Oh, Helen, you are a vision in white…lace…" he added cheekily, his hands running along her slip.

Helen shook her head and kneed him in the groin.

He backed off immediately.

"Ooh, you siren," his grin still plastered on his face.

Helen moved away and composed herself.

"Would you please keep your hands to yourself, Nikola! Try to show a modicum of self-control!" she scolded him and he just smiled at her, if a little pained.

"Ohh, Helen, what would be the fun in that? Especially since you're curious of what I can actually do with these hands," he winked and straightened up.

"Well why don't you put them to practical use and help get us out of here!" she glared at him and he frowned.

"Fine, you minx, one day I will break through that wall of defenses, and…stroke your true nature…" Helen rolled her eyes and resisted the urge to slap him upside the head at his obvious euphemism.

"Please, you couldn't even break through a vase," Helen sighed and sunk to the floor crossing her legs so not to give Nikola a rather generous view.

"Giving up already?" he quirks an eyebrow at her.

"I'm trying to think, and these heels are hard to think in," she groaned and rubbed her ankles.

"You could always take them off," Nikola suggested.

"Already? It hasn't been thirty seconds since I shot down your last come on!" she glared at him again.

"I didn't say anything!" he raised his hands up defensively.

_Hot patootie, bless my soul_

_I really love that Rock and Roll…_

Will and Big Guy sang their best to the lyrics and suddenly something bleeped and another entrance opened up.

"Finally, I was going to lose my voice soon," mumbled Will, coughing slightly.

"Yah," grunted Big Guy and they walked through the entrance that, in turn, closed behind them.

They had entered yet another room with monitors, except instead of four, there was only three.

"You've reached a new level! Congratulations!" came an automated voice as they walked to the monitors.

"Yay for us," said Will sarcastically.

The monitors had the same footage as before, minus the room Will and Big Guy just exited.

The third monitor bleeped and another trivia question came on.

Before Will could even finish reading it Big Guy started typing.

The "Correct!" sounded.

"Nice one Big Guy!" smiled Will and they watched the monitors as the offensive weapons pointed at the rest of the team retreated back into their hiding places. "Real nice!"

Big Guy and Will high-fived before looking back to the third monitor.

The screen flashes to a close-up of the movie and the sound came through the speakers.

…_It was a mercy killing…_

Kate looked behind her when she heard an odd sound and suddenly heard a loud bang and looked down to see a bullet fully embedded into her arm.

Henry ran to her aid.

"Holy crap!" he cried catching her as her legs buckled beneath her. "That is so not cool!"

"Agh! Careful with the hands, or you'll lose them!" Kate winced as Henry lowered her to the floor. "Where is the son of a bitch, I'll give him a taste of his own medicine!"

She grinded her teeth as Henry surfed through his duffle bag for something to dull the pain, as well as ripping some cloth off his shirtsleeve to wrap around her arm to stem the bleeding.

"Uhh, that looks bad, damn I wish the Doc was here," said Henry as he found a small bottle of ibuprofen and handed her a couple of the pills.

"Thanks Henry."

"No problem, just don't die on me," he said wrapping the wound tightly.

"I've had worse!" she muttered as she swallowed the drugs dry.

"And people have died from less," Henry said matter-of-factly.

Kate leaned against the wall.

"Watch your back, I don't want you to end up like swiss cheese along with me," said Kate, her eyes scanning for any more surprises.

"Yah, good point," Henry looked behind him, just in case.

Whatever freak that was the controller of this rabbit hole had upped the stakes, for all of them.


	7. Creature Of The Night

Chapter 7 – Creature of the Night

Big Guy and Will typed furiously at the keyboard, answering the questions as fast as they could.

With Kate being wounded, and Nikola being an ass, it wasn't going to be too long before someone ended up dead.

Will was determined not to let that happen.

Will kept his hands poised over the keyboard while Big Guy read the question and answered it.

He typed in another answer, listened for the 'Correct!' and instead he heard a hidden door slide open.

"Oh thank god!" said Henry; Big Guy rushed in to help him with Kate.

"Oww! Watch the paws Behemoth!" cried Kate as Big Guy scooped her up.

"I thought we were going to be trapped in there forever!" Henry looked at Will who was eyeing the monitor room carefully, looking for anything suspicious.

"Where do we go?" asked Henry.

"Forward, it's the only way we can go," said Will he smirked as he saw something protruding from the wall.

He reached over and grabbed it stuffing it inside his pocket before joining the rest of them inside the room, the door closing behind them.

"So we're trapped again?" Henry stared at Will confused.

"Not for long," Will smirked even wider at the three of them.

Nikola joined Helen on the floor.

After the weapons had sunk back into the wall, a choking sauna-like heat replaced them in the room, making everything hot, wet and clingy.

Helen found it harder to breath by the moment, especially since Nikola standing in his gold shorts, all sweaty, was messing with her mind a little.

"Don't you just love the heat?" he smirked sardonically.

"It could be worse, it could be freezing," shrugged Helen.

"But then we could combine our forces together and keep warm, it would be halfway tolerable compared to this!" he winked and walked his fingers down her thigh.

She didn't flinch, the heat made her too sluggish to do anything.

"As I said, it could be worse," she chuckled weakly.

"You jest, but don't tell me you don't like the idea," he smirked smugly and took his hand back.

"Can we talk about something else for five minutes?" she sighed.

"Fine, you can keep telling me about this movie, if you like, so they reach the castle, meet the creeper staff and the horribly attired party-goers, sing a little, then out comes Dr. Frank-N-Freaky, who shows them to his little boytoy creation…"

"…which is you," Helen pointed out with a smirk.

"Yes, I'm assuming he roots for the other team then," Helen gives him a funny look.

"Seriously Nikola, you have to stop picking up vernacular from Henry, it doesn't suit you," she rolled her eyes.

"Just answer the question and stop nitpicking about how I word it," he bit sarcastically.

"Frank-N-Furter is a sex-crazed maniac, most likely omnisexual, Rocky Horror was just his idea of the ideal mate, but he will do anyone of any age, sex, creed, or culture, sex is his prerogative, that's why he dresses like he does, acts like he does, and why people like him, is this really important for you to know?" she huffs at him.

"And what about your character, she's with that tool, Brad, he reminds me of a certain tall fellow, just with, you know, hair…" Nikola completely ignored her question.

"What's your point?" Helen glared at him, he always had to bring John into this, it was unbelievable.

"Well, Janet's so quiet and reserved, and she is stuck with a chauvinist sexist like that, I mean she can't be very happy," he looked at her with a hint of a smile on his lips.

"You never know, she might be quite content to have a strong, protective man at her side…"

"You never were, which makes me wonder why you chose to dress as that certain character, you could've easily been the Magenta character, which would've been a lot less revealing, you could've even dressed like a female criminologist, but you decided to bare all, and come in the bra and slip, why?"

"Nikola, this is highly…"

"Just tell me what is so interesting about this character!" he poked at her.

"Nothing! She does nothing! Aside from seducing Rocky in the Third Act, she is completely irrelevant," Helen suddenly realized what she said as Nikola's eyes widened.

"Really?" his smirk widens as well into a devious smile.

"Don't you dare…"

"My, my, Helen, I am not the only one thinking lewd and sexually depraved thoughts in this room!"

"You are completely arrogant to think that I dressed you in that and me in this just to seduce you," she glared at him.

"It's clever, I didn't even see it coming; you are a sly one Helen Magnus, very sly…"

"Will you get over yourself, this is neither the time or the place!"

Helen stood up, creating some distance between them, Nikola just followed behind her putting his hands on her waist.

Helen jumped and turned to hit him but was stopped by his lips crashing into hers.

She moaned lightly, involuntarily, the heat of the room and his passion driving her temporarily loco.

She shook her head out of the moment of ecstacy and she kicked him in the leg.

He limped slightly.

"Oh you tease!" Nikola rubbed his leg.

"This is not the time for this!" she growled and turned away from him

_I was feeling done in _

_Couldn't win_

_I'd only ever kissed before…_

Helen wanted to kick herself as the song hit her ears.

"Oh god no…please no…" she muttered under her breath.

She turned and Nikola stood there, in his gold shorts, with a huge grin on his face.

"Seems like fate is on my side," Nikola stepped closer to her carefully.

"All the more reason why we shouldn't do it Nikola, the sick freak running this operation may be watching," she stretched her hands to stop him from coming closer. They touched his bare chest and she suddenly felt butterflies in her stomach, and it took her a moment to realize she was tracing the lines on his chest.

She dropped her hand suddenly.

Nikola just smirked wider.

_I thought there's no use getting_

_Into heavy petting_

_It only leads to trouble_

_And seat wetting…_

Nikola stepped even closer, their bodies almost touching, and Helen's heartbeat ran faster.

She was blaming it on the heat, and the music, and Nikola…all their fault, they were working in conjunction, but damn his shorts looked good on him.

Helen looked at Nikola's lips, they were about to open and say something about how much she wants him, or something equally as obscene.

Before he could utter a syllable she closed the gap between them and wrapped her arms around his neck, kssing him strongly.

He squeaked in surprise but kissed her back, his hands happily finding their way around her waist.

_Now all I want to know_

_Is how to go_

_I've tasted blood and I want more…_

"More…more…more…" Helen mumbled as she pushed Nikola to the wall, this time pinning him under her weight.

_I'll put up no resistance_

_I want to stay the distance…_

Helen felt Nikola's hands playing with the strap on her bra.

Her own hands crawled into his dark spikes, making them even more wild and unruly than they usually are.

Nikola took the opportunity to spin them around so she was against the wall, why his mouth was on her neck, and her leg entwining around his thigh.

_I've got an itch to scratch _

_I need assistance…_

A part of Helen wanted to stop and continue working, but another part of Helen, who had stayed quiet for far too long overpowered it, wanting to finally give in to this man's teasing, and kisses, and just go along with it.

Nikola was both gentle and rampant, wanting to enjoy every touch, feeling and kiss he could get out of this before Helen came to her senses and killed him.

At least he'd die happy.

_Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me_

_I wanna be dirty _

_Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me_

_Creature of the night…_

Will took out the object he had removed from the other room.

It was a garage door opener, and if he was right, it was remote activated, and how this guy was controlling all the doors in this mad place.

"What's that?" asked Henry.

"Hopefully our key to getting out of this place…here Henry, go play," he handed the device to Henry.

"Sweet!" he took it and fiddled with it.

"We need to get Magnus and Tesla out of here before she kills him," Will turned to Big Guy and Kate who nodded in agreement.

Henry exclaimed happily when a small beep resounded.

"Aha! Success!" he smiled proudly.

"Good work Henry!" said Will as the door slid open into the next compartment.

They came up to the next series of monitors, this time only two, one was blacked out and the other showing the main auditorium.

The movie was playing still, but they couldn't hear the soundtrack.

Big Guy gently put Kate down and went up to one of the walls.

"Guhhh, listen!"

He waved them over.

"What is it Big Guy?" asked Will.

"Ughh…music!" He grabbed Will and Henry's heads and pushed it against the wall gruffly.

Behind the wall they heard music, definitely music…

_And that's just one small fraction_

_Of the main attraction _

_You need a friendly hand _

_And I need action _

_Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me_

_I wanna be dirty_

_Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me _

_Creature of the night…_

"Poor Doc, she's stuck in there, with Nikola, and that song…" Henry shook his head. Helen has probably already shot herself.

_Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me…_

Helen couldn't believe it, she had herself entwined around Nikola's body, letting him take her. She would kick herself if she wasn't enjoying herself so much, again she blames it on the heat…or maybe nubbins…

Either way, nothing was stopping her from kissing his elated face.

A part of her wished she had worn more clothes, it would've made it more difficult for him; of course he had done away with them easily.

Maybe she could blame this entire incident on heat stroke, though Nikola would hold it against her for the rest of her life anyways.

She finally let it go, and enjoyed the ride.

…maybe he had finally broken through her defenses, like he said he would…maybe she really wanted him like this…he was so going to pay for this if they got out of here…

"Creature of the night…" she whispered into his ear and he chuckled dryly as they fell to the floor together in a tangled mass of limbs.


	8. Nikki's Teddy

Chapter 8 – Nikki's Teddy

Will looked on the monitor as it beeped and chimed, obviously the little stunt he had pulled hadn't gone unnoticed, he didn't expect it to, but it did mean that they had even less time to save Helen and Nikola.

Big Guy tended to Kate as Henry assisted Will.

"So, Heinrich, can you hack the hacker?" asked Will looking at Henry.

"Dude, you've been spending some time with Tesla haven't you?' Henry gave him a look and Will poked him back playfully.

"Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood," Will smiled apologetically and Henry relented.

"Well his system is mostly jury-rigged together, I mean the guy is a whiz if he got these things working, it's a mess though, but lucky for us, I can hack the pentagon with my eyes shut, just give me a minute."

Henry smirked at Will before typing furiously on the keyboard.

Will went back to the spot in the wall, where they could only assume was the door.

He was hoping to hear more from the other side than just music, just to know that they hadn't been gassed out, or killed each other.

He heard nothing.

Nikola collapsed beside Helen, gasping for breath, grinning like a Chesire cat.

Helen wrapped a hand around his waist and laid her head on his arm.

"Well this proves it, the gold shorts were a bad idea," Helen laughed out.

"Says you, they worked quite well for me," said Nikola.

"And I'm never going to hear the end of it," said Helen, here smile betraying her words.

"Yah, but, on some twisted sexy level you enjoyed it, or you wouldn't be cuddling me right now, you'd be trying to kill me," joked Nikola.

"You never know, maybe I'm just cold, the blazing heat seems to have gone," she teased back, absentmindedly tracing his chest.

"Well, I don't believe you," Nikola pressed a kiss lightly into her hair, and she smiled again.

"Well, you owe me dinner now," Helen said smugly.

"Are you a call girl now?" joked Nikola, he raised an eyebrow at her curiously.

"No, but I'm not the type to sleep around and not be courted, at least a little, John had the common decency to take me on a date first before trying to get in my pants," Helen sat up and threw his gold shorts at him.

"And look where that got you!" he joked as he put them on.

"Doesn't matter, Nikola, I gave you what you wanted, now I get something in return, I want a date!" Helen dressed back and stood firmly in front of him.

"I'm pretty sure the third time round was your gift in return," Nikola gave her a cheeky smile, she smacked him in the chest.

"I'm being serious, if you want to see any of this ever again," she gestured to her body, "Take me out to dinner, some place nice, maybe on a Friday or Saturday night, and you pay, like a proper gentleman!"

Nikola's face scrunched up in a whine, and Helen stared smugly in victory.

"Ohh, fine! I'll take you on a date."

"No, ask me properly, get on one knee if you have to, seriously Nikola, when was the last time you tried to woo a girl!" Helen crossed her arms and Nikola whined even louder.

"Well I thought it was about an hour ago, but you and I have very different opinions on the meaning of wooing…" He begrudgingly got on one knee and sighed heavily.

"That wasn't wooing that was slutting, very different," Helen tried to suppress her giggle.

Nikola gave her a sarcastic smile.

"Heleeeeen…" he whined like a child, and she let a small giggle escape.

"I'm waiting!" she bounced on the balls of her feet.

"Will you…go on a date with me…please…" he said sardonically and Helen shook her head.

"No, like you mean it! Not like it's a prostate exam! Use some of those theatrics you do so well!" she giggled again.

He sighed heavily, took her hand, and kissed the top of it lightly. He looked straight into her eyes.

"Will you, beautiful, gorgeous creature that you are, Helen Magnus, allow me, your humble admirer…" Helen giggled when he said humble; Nikola was anything but humble, "…don't knock it…" Nikola gave her a funny look and she grinned, "…to take you to dinner, sometime in the near future?"

Helen laughed again.

"Oh yes! A thousand times yes!" she joked and threw her arms around him like he had just asked her to marry him.

She kissed him lightly, and his scowl instantly warmed into a goofy smile.

"Now was that so hard?" she teased.

"Oh, unbelievably so," he jested and kissed her again.

He was still on his knees, but he had his arms wrapped around her waist, and she leaned further into him, giggling as she kissed him.

Henry lifted his hands up in victory.

"Guys I think I've got it!" he exclaimed wildly.

"Really? Good job Henry!" said Will coming up to see the werewolf's handiwork.

"Did you ever doubt me?" Henry grinned smugly.

"Not even for a moment!" Will watched as Henry typed a few more keys.

The music filled the room through the speakers.

_From the day he was born _

_He was trouble…_

Henry chuckled to himself.

"Sounds like Vlad," he gave a sideglance to Will who laughed in agreement.

"Is this all you managed to accomplish?" asked Will.

"Give me a moment, I just have to find the right controls," he typed a bit more and then all the hidden doors slid open.

"Nice one, Hank!" said Kate, and Big Guy picked her up.

They entered into the room holding Helen and Nikola but stopped short when they saw them, in each others arm, kissing.

_When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy_

_You knew he was a no good kid _

_But when he threatened your life _

_With a switch blade knife_

_What a guy_

_Makes you cry_

_And I did…_

Helen was enjoying kissing Nikola, so she was unaware of the new presence, or presences, in the room. If Nikola had noticed, he didn't say anything.

It wasn't until she heard a cough that she was pulled back into reality.

She immediately pushed herself away from Nikola and hid her face to cover her deep red blush.

"I see you're in much duress…" Will said sarcastically, giving her a look.

"It's…it's not what it looks like…" said Helen lamely.

"Uh-huh…" Will continued to give her the look.

"It's exactly what it looks like," said Nikola, being unhelpful, as always, smiling smugly.

"All we did was kiss, no matter…" Helen defended like a teenage caught with the boy's hand down her skirt.

"Oh, we did more than just kiss…" added Nikola, she threw him an icy glare and he grinned even wider.

"Shut it, Nikola, you're not helping…" she whispered harshly at him.

"If this was a diary it would have multiple entries…" Nikola ignored her threatening glance, and decided to milk this situation for every ounce of fun it had.

"Nikola!" cried Helen in shock and disgust.

"That's what she said…" Nikola chorkled with amusement.

Helen lost it and grabbed him firmly by the groin, making him squeak with pain.

"Shut up, or I'll remove your second favorite ability, got it?" she whispered harshly at him.

He squeaked again and nodded his head.

She let him go and he crumpled like a wet newspaper to the floor.

"Alright lets get a move on and get out of here!" Helen switched the focus around immediately, though the rest of the team stared at the pathetic whimpering heap on the floor, which was Nikola, in surprise and amusement.

Helen turned on her heel and walked briskly through the doorways that Henry had managed to open.

"Don't say a word…" she muttered to Will who had fallen into step beside her.

"I wasn't planning to," he smirked and kept walking beside her with Big Guy and Kate right behind, and Nikola, slowly making his way, using the wall for support.

"What a woman…" Nikola muttered to himself as he limped after them.

_When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy _

_You knew he was a no good kid _

_But when he threatened your life _

_With a switch blade knife_

_What a guy (Whoa ho ho)_

_Makes you cry (Hey Hey Hey)_

_And I did…_


	9. Better Wise Up Helen Magnus

Chapter 9 – Better Wise Up, Helen Magnus

Helen felt a twinge of doubt bubble inside her; this all felt too easy. Not that she doubted the ingenuity of her team, but there had been no repercussions of their actions. From what Will had said, someone was definitely watching them, so them cheating the system usually would have an armada of hell reigning upon them by now.

Either that, or Nikola was right, maybe some sick freak was the puppet master to this.

Ughh…and she had given in…

She held the stun-gun tentatively, atleast grateful that Henry never came unprepared.

Big Guy still carried Kate, who was leaking blood like a broken faucet, well, enough to cause some worry.

Will had the other gun in hand, keeping his eyes peeled for any other tricks, and Nikola brought up the rear with his hands clasped behind his back and him whistling Touch Me, just to get on her nerves.

"Nikola will you please stop that racket! We are trying to proceed with a modicum of stealth!" she scolded him, which he took with a grin.

"Really Helen? Don't you think that if whoever is running this game was going to come after us he would've done it by now?" Nikola gave her a look and she grinded her teeth.

"Maybe he is waiting for one of us to screw up so he can make his move unexpectedly, now shut it!" she growled at him and he frowned at her.

"Seriously Helen, you are so paranoid, just because you're embarrassed doesn't mean you have to be bitter," he said cheekily making Helen sneer and turn on her heel to keep walking.

"Dude, you are playing with a time-bomb, stop it before she blows up," said Henry.

"Oh, don't worry, she loves me…" smirked Nikola and he kept striding along behind the group, most likely staring intently at Helen's ass.

The group went on for a bit more till Helen stopped.

"Do any of you know where we are going?" asked Nikola non-chalantly, as he leaned against the wall.

"Of course we don't, but so far there has only been one route, this way has to lead to the exit!" said Will.

"Maybe that's why we haven't been experiencing anything nasty, maybe he's making us go around in circles!" said Henry.

They all stared at Helen who had her brow scrunched up in concentration.

"What would be the point in making us go around in circles?" asked Will.

"To make us frustrated, I don't know what kind of sick freak runs this thing, he might think it's funny!" shouted Henry.

"Or that we're running out of time, guh guh!" said Big Guy, he cradled Kate who was unconscious now.

"Well what do we do about it?" asked Will and Helen turned around to face them.

"I don't know, but we must do something fast," she searched their faces for any ideas.

"Well we could go back the way we came or go forward, your choice," muttered Nikola with a hint of humour.

"Your no help, Nikola," Helen looked away from him.

"Tracking dots! I always bring them!" Henry digged through his bag and pulled out the little devices taking one and handing it to Helen. "If we're going around in circles we'll know."

"Good work Henry!" Helen took the device and placed it on the wall.

She turned around.

"Alright lets keep walking, move your feet Nikola!" she glared at him and he grinned back.

"Right behind you HELLLLENNN!" Helen almost did a double take as the wall Nikola had been leaning on turned taking the man with it.

The speakers buzzed to life again.

_I'll tell you once_

_I won't tell you twice_

_You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss _

_Your apple pie don't taste too nice _

_You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss_

Helen gasped and went up to the wall and pushed on it, it didn't budge.

"Nikola!"

She got no answer.

"Well that's great, that's just perfect! Now we have to find him again!" groaned Will.

"I don't think he's sitting in a concrete room waiting to be rescued this time…we should probably hurry," said Henry, his face covered in worry.

Helen nodded her head and started to jog down the corridor, with the rest of them trailing behind her.

_I've laid the seed, it should be all you need _

_You're as sensual as a pencil _

_Wound up like an 'E' or first string _

_When we made it, did you hear a bell ring? _

_You got a block, well take my advice _

_You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss_

Helen kept running until she felt like the ground beneath her had gone, and then before she knew it she was falling.

More like tumbling…

A little bit of sliding…

She heard the rest of the team falling behind her.

Suddenly she was flying again and landing hard on to the floor.

_Planet! _

Henry came flying afterwards.

_Schmanet! _

Will and Kate landed on top of them.

_Janet! _

Big Guy came rolling down completing the dog pile.

_You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss _

_You'd better wise up_

_Build your thighs up _

Helen gasped for breath and squirmed from under the pile of bodies atop her.

"That was fun," said Will sarcastically.

They hadn't landed in a room like before, but into what looked like a steel cage.

It was an elevator, well, a prop elevator, one used for the live playing of Rocky, or maybe for gimics.

The elevator doors closed behind them and soon she felt a shift and the elevator started its slow ascent to lord knows where.

_You'd better wise up, Janet Weiss!_


	10. The Floor Show

Chapter 10 – The Floor Show

Helen untangled herself from the mass of limbs, guns, and hair in the elevator and tried to figure out where they were being taken to; up, that was the obvious answer.

She put her hands on the doors and tried t pull it open, but it was magnetically sealed.

Of course, it was so like Nikola, there whenever you don't need him, gone the minute you do.

There were also no controls, buttons, or any way of stalling the elevator.

"Well this is just perfect!" growled Will, as he got up and slapped a hand across the metal bars.

"Don't lose hope, we could still get out of here," said Helen, her face betraying her words.

"How? There is no exit, no controls, no magical button, and no Nikola! Every time we take two steps forward this puppet master pushes us back five! How are we supposed to win if he keeps changing the rules?" fumed Will.

"My arm is definitely twisted," mumbled Henry, holding his wrist.

"Even better! Now Henry is out of commission! Kate is not going to wake up without a blood transfusion, and Big Guy has to carry her!" Will paced angrily in the small space.

"Don't count Nikola out; who knows, whoever runs this thing might release us just to get rid of him," Helen suggested lightly.

"Well, that's something," Will sighed and sat down on the floor as Helen went over to Henry to examine his wrist.

Big Guy tended to Kate gently, redressing her wound, and trying to stem the bleeding again.

Suddenly the elevator jerked to a stop right behind the screen, the movie still playing on it.

"Well, this wasn't what I was expecting," muttered Helen, surprised to see the space empty, and not swarmed with scary contraptions, or their captor, which only made her more curious as to where he was.

They exited the elevator cautiously and walked back into the auditorium.

She spun around when she heard clapping and turned to see Nikola sitting in one of theatre seats, completely unharmed.

"Of course, I should have known, this had all the markings of one of your schemes," Helen growled bitterly.

"As much as I'd love to take the credit for this one, my dear Helen, it wasn't me, because if I went through so much trouble to sleep with you, why would I drag along the children?" he stood up and strode over to them.

"For sport," muttered Helen, eyeing him coldly and disbelievingly.

"And put their pretty little heads in danger, come now Helen, I am way too fond of them for that," he looked at Kate and Henry.

"Maybe you didn't mean for it to happen, but you were kind of distracted at the time," she spat bitterly.

"Helen, I promise you, my days of tricking you into underground traps are over, once was enough, and you shot me!" he took her hand, and held on tightly despite her resistance. "Please listen to me, Helen."

He looked at her sincerely and she relented slightly.

"Fine, if you are telling the truth, who do you think is running this place?" she kept staring into his face for any hint of a lie.

"Someone very sneaky, and fond of my work, look over here," he waved them over to a small device on the wall.

"What is it?" asked Helen.

He waved his hand over it.

Nothing happened.

"Wait for it…" mumbled Nikola.

Then suddenly the room burst to life with a exuberant crowd.

"It's motion censored with a time delay, we most likely set it off walking to our seats," he smiled widely.

"If that's true, wouldn't it have gone of earlier?" Helen looked at the device with curiosity.

"Yes, but…I;ve been fiddling with it, it's a derivative of some technology I was working on about 1940, an ingenius decoy if I do say so myself, I had a working prototype and everything, but then the whole death ray business stopped it from actually patenting, it was all part of the files I had locked up and gave you for safe keeping when I went into hiding," Helen looked at him.

"Your not helping your case," she gave him a hard look.

"Well, I'd completely forgotten about it till I saw it fifteen minutes ago, for all I know, you've still had the design and the prototype in your possession, or you may have lost it in the recent years, I don't know, but it wasn't me!" Nikola moved away from the group and Helen followed.

She didn't want to admit it, but she didn't regret the moment she shared with Nikola in that cell, and it was true, he hadn't known anything about Rocky Horror, and she had been the one to make him wear those ridiculous shorts, the only reason he was actually here was because she had wanted him to be. Sudden;y the idea of him being the mastermind behind this fiasco became less plausible, sure he had the intelligence, but if he wanted to sleep with her he could've just stolen a nubbin and hid it in her room.

"Nikola, I believe you, you are far too arrogant to go to this extreme just for sex," Helen teased lightly and he gave her a look.

"Hey, it wasn't just sex, well it was, but you mean more than that to me; I meant what I said in Rome, nevermind that I tried to kill you afterwards, we've already had that argument, but my words were true, sex was just a bonus," Helen smiled as Nikola rambled on, and she eventually just closed her lips over his mouth, cutting off whatever he had left to say.

"You talk too much," Helen chuckled and smiled at him, he gave her a goofy smile in return.

The moment was ruined by Will coughing to get their attention.

"As much as I hate to ruin this hallmark moment, we're still stuck in here."

"Not necessarily, the door is unlocked," said Nikola.

"What? And you were planning to share this when?" asked Helen.

"Well I wanted to show you the hologram projector thingy first, you have to admit it's pretty cool," said Nikola pointing innocently at the device.

Helen sighed and took his hand dragging him out of the auditorium.

"It's been a long day," muttered Helen, the rest of the team following behind.

They got into the foyer of the theatre, and Helen almost sighed in relief at seeing the front doors, and the world beyond them.

"That's more like it!" Helen said, her face beaming a bit more hopefully.

Suddenly a feeling of light-headedness came upon her and she fell to the ground, the team coming down with her.

"Gas!" she gasped out.

She felt Nikola's fingers wrap around her hand, and she gripped them tightly.

"See you on the other side," he muttered before collapsing completely into unconsciousness.

Helen lazily reached a hand over hand stroked his hair back gently before slipping away herself.


	11. Super Heroes

Chapter 11 – Super Heroes

_Super heroes_

_God knows I've tried _

_To find the truth_

_I've even lied_

_But all I know_

_Is down inside I'm_

_Bleeding…_

Helen's eyes lazily opened, the world was a blur of music, sounds, and voices.

"Magnus! Helen!" a voice called to her.

"Nikola…" she groaned out, it was the only name she could think of.

"Not quite, darling, but I'm flattered," a new voice added to the mix.

"Magnus, are you ok?" the first voice spoke t her again, she found it hard to make out faces.

She groaned out a response.

"She's still a little woozy from the gas," the voice said again.

She suddenly felt a light tapping on her cheek and the world snapped into crystal clear clarity.

"Doctor Magnus, good to see you, you had us worried when we got the call," the voice suddenly found an owner, and it belonged to none other than Declan Macrae.

"Declan? What are you doing here?" she looked around and saw them wheel out Kate on a stretcher and a med-team was tending Henry and the rest of the team were sharing oxygen masks in the corner.

"We received a call, about two hours ago saying that you guys were in trouble here, I must tell you I was expecting worse, but we've sweeped the whole building, it's clean," Declan helped Helen sit up.

Nikola strode over and knelt beside her stuffing the oxygen mask in her face.

"He was the first one up, and has been a bloody pest the entire time," Declan gave Nikola a look and Nikola just shrugged sheepishly.

"I was concerned, that's all," Helen pushed the mask away from her only to have Nikola stick it right back and she sighed.

"I'm fine, Nikola," she said calmly and he finally lowered the mask.

"As I said, I'm just concerned…" he subtley checked her over for any injuries, not believing the other 3 medics and Declan who said she was fine.

"I can't wait to hear the explanation for this one," Declan smirked, and gestured to Nikola's shorts, Helen's bra, and the duffel bag of black leather and lace in Henry's possession. "I don't think I want to know."

Helen rolled her eyes.

"It's a long story; one better told back at the sanctuary, after a shower and some hot tea," Helen stood up, graciously accepting Nikola's help this time as the gas had still left her quite light headed.

Nikola smiled at her, he was probably thinking about joining her in that shower, Helen couldn't help but thinking of just cordially inviting him, after all, he was far too concerned about her well being to let her go anywhere alone.

"What do you think happened to our no-show?" asked Will.

"He had his fun and left to spread his reign of terror elsewhere," said Nikola, his arm wrapping around Helen to support her weight until she could get her bearings, which for now she'd just let them be lost, he was warm and the lack of adrenaline pumping through her system had brought on a chill.

Nikola must've read her thoughts cause he just hugged her tighter.

"Lets go home please," whined Henry and they all nodded in agreement.

_And crawling on the planet's face_

_Some insects called the human race _

_Lost in time, and lost in space _

_And meaning_


	12. Science Fiction

Chapter 12 – Science Fiction

Helen signed off the final report of the "Rocky Horror Affair", as Henry had dubbed it. Truly the most bizarre case they've ever had, and they still didn't know the culprit, but at this point, Helen didn't want to know, nor did she care to.

This last signature meant the whole ordeal was done and buried.

The costumes were washed and sent back to Helen's contact, minus the blonde wig that Nikola had left, but no one really felt obligated to go back and retrieve it.

"This ends that!" Helen exclaimed triumphantly and Will cheered and applauded.

"May we go on with our lives!" Will handed her a cup of tea and they toasted the final sealing of the event.

Two days of debriefing, followed by 16 hours of paperwork and reports, it was a good thing to finally be done with it.

Henry's arm was in a brace, Kate was recovering in the infirmary, soon it would all be behind them.

"It's a shame though, I'm going to really miss those gold shorts," joked Helen.

"I'm not," laughed Will.

Helen laughed back taking a sip of tea.

"Well, hopefully it will never happen again," Helen sighed.

"Yes, I will make a point of it," Will sighed himself and lounged in his chair.

"Well, it's finished, over and done with, sealed by the FedEx deadline, and we'll never have to speak of it again!" Helen smiled.

"Excellent! So what's the plans for tonight? Going to burn the midnight oil? Curl up and watch old Clark Gable films in the media room.

"Nope, I have a date," Helen smiled even wider.

"The great Doctor Helen Magnus, on a date? I don't believe it!" Will condescended.

"Cheeky," chuckled Helen.

"So you finally let ole' Vlad get to you?" smirked Will.

"Well he asked nicely," Helen bit her lip to hide a blush.

"Is that all it took?" asked Will incredulously.

"Actually I had to force him, but either way, I get to wear a dress and be pretty," Helen teased and headed to the office door. "You can handle this place for the evening?"

"Yah, piece of cake," Will smiled, it was good to see the Doc take a break, even if it was with the most obnoxious ex-vampire that ever roamed the planet.

Helen smiled and exited her office, meeting her date for the evening, as always, dressed to the nines, in the main foyer of the Sanctuary.

"My, my, Doctor Magnus, you clean up good," said Nikola, he held a single white rose in his hand.

"You know Big Guy is going to kill you once he finds out you've been stealing his flowers," Helen joked but accepted the flower.

"He'll understand," Nikola shrugged and offered her his arm, which she took.

"So where are we going?" she asked excitedly.

"It's a surprise," said Nikola as he leaned over and kissed her lightly before opening the door and leading her out to the town car outside.

Will watched the car leave from the office window, a smile adorned his face, it was just like them to find love in the oddest places, they couldn't love each other under normal circumstances.

Big Guy and Henry entered and stood beside him.

"So what are the plans for tonight?" asked Henry.

"We've got the place to ourselves, I say we fire up hardcore action films in the media room with some popcorn and beer," said Will non-chalantly.

"Awesome dude!" said Henry.

"We'll meet you there," said Big Guy.

"Ok," Will turned and left the office leaving the two of them where he had just been.

They stared after the fading car going over the hill in the direction of New City.

"Good work, RiffRaff," smirked Henry, he looked over at Big Guy.

"Good work, Frank," grunted Big Guy.

"Hey are you guys coming?" asked Will.

"Yep!"

They shared a quick look and then ran after Will with a small, but devious smile hinting at the corners of their mouths.

_~~~Rocky~~~_

_Amanda Tapping is here_

_And she shows no fear_

_As she saves abnormal creature from man_

_And Robin Dunne is there _

_In his underwear_

_Ryan Robbins is the technical man_

_And Christopher Heyerdahl_

_In a dual role_

_As the butler and the devious Jack_

_Nikola Tesla can be found_

_When he comes around_

_They just keep on bringing him back_

_On_

_Sanctuary (ooh ooh ooh) On Syfy_

_Chuck is two-faced (ooh ooh ooh) Michael Shanks will die_

_All the monsters (ooh ooh ooh) that you can get_

_But where the heck is (ooh ooh ooh) David Hewlett_

_Wuh uh uh uhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show_

_I want to know_

_Wuh uh uhhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show._

_Major Davis comes back_

_And has a spazz attack_

_At the wife of Peter Deluise_

_And that gal who plays Kate_

_Girl you love to hate_

_She's a tough one but she aims to please_

_Peter Wingfield was great_

_Doctor Watson's fate_

_Never thought that he would end up dead_

_And though Ashley is gone_

_It won't be for too long_

_Hope they bring her back before season ten_

_On_

_Sanctuary (ooh ooh ooh) On Syfy_

_Chuck is two-faced (ooh ooh ooh) Michael Shanks will die_

_All the monsters (ooh ooh ooh) that you can get_

_But where the heck is (ooh ooh ooh) David Hewlett_

_Wuh uh uh uhhhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show_

_I want to know_

_Wuh uh uhhhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show_

_Not HBO_

_Wuh uh uhhhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show_

_I heart J-Yo_

_Wuh uh uhhhhhh_

_On the late night science fiction tv show_

_~~~End Notes~~~_

_Thanks for reading my fanfic, I got inspired by this after I made a video about Nikola and Helen to a song from Rocky. It spurred into this wacky little idea, and into this fic. I hop you enjoyed reading it's twists and turns, ups and downs, and plain out madness. Read & Review, tell me some of your favorite parts, don't correct my grammar, and have a very Merry Christmas :)_


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